I was selling a bedroom set on Facebook Marketplace, and someone attempted to scam me. I’ve sold over a hundred items, ranging from motorized items to earrings, on this platform over the years, and I’ve never had a bad experience. This one involved payment, extensive texting with the buyer, and a phone call with a customer service agent who requested that I send $500.00 to the buyer, which the company would then refund. None of it made sense, and after he threatened me with fraud for refusing, I disconnected the call.

I finally listened to my body tension—My arms were tight, my mind was muddled. I was frustrated.

That all happened last week. Since then, a woman told me she received this official letter in the mail from the Census Bureau. The letter said she was required to send invasive personal information. A red flag hit her in the face, prompting her to call someone she trusted and ask if they thought it was legit.

Other women in the group shared their stories. They were all upset with the possibilities of losing money, safety, or any other sense of well-being.

Before I had even heard of romance scammers, I met a woman who was working as an in-home caregiver and sending nearly every penny of her small hourly wage, selling her car, and asking her employers to pay her in advance, so she could help an online guy who “loved” her. He scammed not just the woman, but the older couple she cared for.

I don’t know about you, my reader, but I no longer work outside my home. I’m not around break room chatter, and I’m more vulnerable because I’m a senior, spend a lot of time alone, and I trust people. I’m sure my voice sounds older, and we all know we have zero privacy—our houses are on record as to political party, and our age, address, debt, credit score, marriage status, etc., are common knowledge with just a few clicks of the keyboard.

What I’ve learned from my experience and the stories of others is that scamming is common, and we all need to listen to our bodies when they tell us to halt, stop, hang up, or walk away. Mainly, we need to talk with each other. I felt foolish and scattered when I hung up. I could have chosen a less embarrassing topic to write about this week. Still, it’s crucial to share these despicable scams to alert our friends, guide them on how to handle the situations, and offer understanding that good people are not always well-equipped to handle dishonest manipulators.

If it happens, forgive yourself for your momentary blindness, share your experience with others, and be thankful that you are now wiser.

Until the next time: Live while you live.

Jennifer Goble, Ph.D., LPC, is the author of “My Clients…My Teachers,” and the blogger and writer of Rural Women Stories: www.ruralwomenstories.com.

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