Love is and always has been the goal and the prize

Sweet, compatible relationships are a gift in life. We might be lucky enough to have at least one trusted friend, a like-minded business colleague, a special bond with one or more of our kids, or, as I observed recently, a loving marriage.

I was in a restaurant with my family, and a couple I hadn’t seen in a while was seated near me. From my vantage point, I could only see the husband. I noticed the enjoyment on his face and how he looked at his wife. I couldn’t see the wife but could hear her soft, feminine laughter consistently. The husband was tuned in, engaged, and laughing with her as he consistently kept his eyes on her face. He didn’t look around to see who else was in the room or walking by, he had no awareness of my occasional glance, and whatever they were visiting about was entertaining to both.

It was delightful to witness.

Sadly, it’s not unusual to see couples eat an entire meal together and speak fewer than a few words. If someone they know walks by, they might light up, talk, and even laugh, only to go back and stare at the wall or look down at the table when alone again.

That scenario makes me sad all over.

There are many quotes about Love. Paul McCartney from the Beatles said, “All we need is love.” Aristotle, who lived three centuries before Christ, said, Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.” The Bible says, “Love is patient, love is kind.”

My experience of Love is many things, and it depends on whether it is new love or, for lack of a better word, old love. A friend of mine, whose husband of 60+ years depends on her for life, said when I called her a saint, “Oh, he is wonderful! He is never a burden—the sweetest man ever.”

That, my friends, is what I call Love. Might we all be so lucky?

I say, “Love is different for every person, but all in all, it starts with excitement and hopefulness, gets tossed around as life happens, and with tenacity ends up in sync with the three quotes—it’s all we need. It feels like one soul in two bodies, and it’s patient and kind.

I hope we all have love that feels deep and secure. If you have it now, like the couple at the restaurant, don’t mess it up with criticism, competition, silent treatment, nasty words, or denial of affection. Hold each other high like a treasure, and show love at every opportunity. Love is and always has been the goal and the prize.

Until the next time: Live while you live.

Jennifer Goble, Ph.D., LPC, is the author of “My Clients…My Teachers,” and the blogger and writer of Rural Women Stories: www.ruralwomenstories.com.