Mental health is complex because it runs the gamut of one to ten, with ten being not good and one being the bottom of the dark hole. Topics on how to improve mental health are on the entire spectrum. But one thing that flows through it all is balance. If we can think, plan, and live with balance as a goal, most of the time, we have better odds of creating a life above a five—a … [Read more...]
Newspaper Column, "Mental Matters" published each Wednesday in the South Platte Sentinel Health Section
Abuse is not love—love is not abusive
A friend recently told me a guy friend of hers went to an attorney because his wife filed for divorce, and he didn’t want a divorce. The attorney told him if he wanted her to stay, he needed to abuse her. Understandably, I was appalled. I couldn’t believe an attorney or anyone would suggest such an absurd action. Shortly after, I watched “It Ends with Us.” It was about a … [Read more...]
Be yourself, honest, and clear
I received a call early one morning and, unfortunately, said, “Okay, why not?” to a Hilton Honors smooth-talker offering a reduced-rate hotel room. All I had to do was listen to a fifteen-minute presentation. Fast-forward a day, another person called to explain what I committed to doing. I found out the presentation was two hours long, and the room provided was a Hampton … [Read more...]
My vote is YES for New Year’s Resolutions
Deepak Chopra said, “We spend money we don’t have on things we don’t need to impress people we don’t like.” The quote made me smile, but we could all feel like that now. Our credit cards are bulging, and our bank accounts are starving. Christmas can be a time of giving and getting too much. New Year’s Resolutions come to the rescue! New Year’s Resolutions are commitments to … [Read more...]
Expect nothing but enjoy everything about holidays
Following is an unedited version of the first article I wrote for the South Platte Sentinel in 12/22/2010. Thanks to Delinda Korrey for saying yes to my Mental Matters column and to Cathy Miller for graciously editing many of my first submissions. It's funny how the basics of good mental wellness don’t change over the years. May you all create a blessed Christmas. I retired … [Read more...]
These are the days, my friend
Here we are in the middle of the holiday season, and kudos to the families and municipal crews who brighten our community with lights of many colors. We are so lucky to live where pride and high standards prevail. And isn’t it a blessing to feel our spirits rise? It’s hard not to think of Christmases past as I enjoy events and festivities this year. Growing up, we hung … [Read more...]
Don’t short-side yourself
This week, I have been thinking about goals. Goals are purposeful—goals can be golden. Where would we be today if we didn’t have a purpose or a reason to put our feet on the floor each morning? A reasonable goal has standards. The acronym SMART is one way to remember how to construct a goal. A goal should be: Specific (Know the details of what you want.) Measurable … [Read more...]
Thankfulness extends beyond the obvious
As I sit at my computer to write this week’s article for Thanksgiving, I am eating a Sees chocolate – a white Apple Pie Truffle. It is delicious, and I am thankful. Yum! I am thankful for the sweet, smooth, decadent filling and the dipped chocolate that melts on my tongue. I am grateful for the anticipation of pure delight as the impeccable treat teases my eyes and taste … [Read more...]
Trust the value of ‘old’ friends
While sitting on an airport shuttle, a man to my left said he would visit his aging mother in TX and said he had to get a ranch sitter. A woman to my right said, “Oh, I can’t image a RANCH sitter I could barely find a dog sitter.” Everyone laughed, and the man continued by saying he lived in the mountains but was from Sterling. I said, “I’m from Sterling.” The conversation … [Read more...]
Plant the seed and watch it grow
I saw this quote somewhere: “We find what we look for.” At first, I thought, “That’s not true. If I look for money falling from trees, my odds of finding what I’m looking for are zero.” What the quote’s author meant was similar to the Cherokee grandfather who told his grandkids a story about two wolves fighting inside each of us. One wolf is mean, nasty, and scary; the … [Read more...]
Three words to embrace
I’m writing this before we know the election results, so I hope this finds all humans acting human. I look forward to less drama and more civility in our homes, communities, and country. If you’re reading this, your team either won or lost, the world didn’t end, and the sun came up like it always does. And I still Love Lucy! Now is an appropriate time to discuss three words: … [Read more...]
I know if they can, we can
My favorite things do not match the song lyrics in “The Sound of Music,” but I would like to know if we identify, think about, and do our favorite things often enough. What are your favorite things? Gratitude, thankfulness, and appreciation are vast elements of mental wellness, and we need to know our favorite things and choose them more often. Like all of life, what we … [Read more...]
Win or lose, life goes on—if we get out of its way
Many of us have voted or will vote soon, and the whole process makes me think of the complexity of decisions—choices. Months, maybe years ago, we each started processing our thoughts, forming a wish or hope list for what party we supported, who we wanted to represent us, and cementing a defense for our position. Let’s assume you’re a Democrat and the Republican wins, or … [Read more...]
Excitement can be a false friend or a positive life changer
The Oxford Dictionary defines excitement as “a feeling of great enthusiasm and eagerness.” It is synonymous with words like joy, pleasure, thrill, adventure, treat, and delight. I recently heard a theory where, simply stated, the excitement we feel should/would/could be the guiding force behind our decisions. If we follow the excitement we feel, we will be making correct and … [Read more...]
If you want true love, share your true self
A friend my age has been in love and communicating with a guy for 50+ years. Yep, fifty years. He married in college and had kids; she worked, never married, and had no kids. His wife died unexpectedly—OMG, he was available. After nearly a year of waiting a respectable time, he still had not mentioned her to his kids, and he busied himself with golf and guy things. Let me … [Read more...]