Candidates just ‘want to talk about me’

Mental Matters
By Dr. Jennifer Goble

In my old age, I am becoming political. Yep, I watched both grueling and entertaining Republican and Democratic debates.

With my background, I paid particular attention to body language and facial expressions. Considering what I believe makes a quality person, I noticed behavior and respect shown toward others.

I also tried to determine if each was a thinking, logical person, or a feeling, value driven person. Did each listen, become defensive, answer the actual questions, primarily criticize, speak of their superiority, or disclose plans and contributions?

Most of one group collectively resembled Rex Harrison in “My Fair Lady.”

If you recall, Professor Henry Higgins was a self-absorbed elitist. He exuded joy over his own words and accomplishments, and

saw poor Eliza Doolittle as a possession – someone who might contribute to his accolades.

He did demonstrate kindness on rare occasions and was quite bright, but primarily wanted every-one to be as he saw himself, perfect.

All panelists reminded me of the song, “I Want to Talk About Me,” by country singer Toby Keith. Lyrics include:

“I want to talk about me…

“What I think, what I like, what I know, what I want, what I see

“I like talking about you, you, you, you usually,

“But occasionally

“I want to talk about me…”

I listened for statements that related to ME and YOU. I wanted to hear America’s strengths, and solutions for her struggles.

I survived the debates by pretending to be the CEO of my company, looking to choose an equal partner from the 16 people on stage.

Some I dismissed immediately. Others intrigued me with their basic logic and ability to listen and process. A few had personal agendas and one was mad. They all lost my vote. One on each side won my vote.

I’m not telling.

You can bet I chose someone who had an intellectual opinion, rational ego, spoke to the point, remembered all Americans, and did not negate me and you. S/he also had a balance of knowledge and humor.

If I am choosing a partner to help me run our precious America, I want intelligence, communication and negotiating skills, common values, fiscal success, and a conscience.

Mainly I desire a collaborating colleague I trust, and one who will trust me. How about you?

Until the next time: Live while you live!

(Jennifer Goble, Ph.D. is a Licensed Professional Counselor. Check out her book, My Clients…My Teachers and her weekly blog at www.jennifergoble.com.)

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