Balance is the goal and the magic key

Twice this week, I heard how important it is to be a human BEING instead of a human DOING. Shakespeare’s Hamlet, somewhere around 1600, said, “To be, or not to be, that is the question.”

My question is, how does one separate being from doing? Praying or meditating is a great way to get inside ourselves, but both also require some doing: thought, intention, purpose, desire, and skill.

Being is more complicated than doing, but I do both simultaneously. When busy with a stimulating, isolated task, I’m in the zone and as close to myself as possible. We cannot be or not be. We are. We are all beings; if we’re lucky, we are also doers.

One of the most challenging questions is, “Who are you? Tell me about yourself.” How can that be hard to answer? We live with ourselves every second of every day.

I’m sharing a suggested exercise–it was worth my time and a way to see the many layers between being and doing.

Sit comfortably, and say to yourself:

“I am . . .” Include your first, middle, and last name. For me, “I am Jennifer Jo Goble.”

Close your eyes and think about that for a minute or two. Then, open your eyes.

“I am . . .” Include only your first name. For me: “I am Jennifer.” Close your eyes and sit with that thought for a minute or two. Open your eyes.

“I am.” Include nothing else. Close your eyes and think about that thought for a minute or two. Then, open your eyes.

In those three exercises, I hope you found a more precise answer to the question, “Who are you? Tell me about yourself.”

I found different parts of myself in the three examples: my worldview, personal view, and core or roots.

My answer to the question, “Who are you? Tell me about yourself,” differed in each scenario. In #1, I might be visiting with a friend on the patio. In #2, I would likely be at a job interview, and #3 was me BEING.

Your experience will differ from mine, but the simple exercise is an excellent beginning to finding your foundation, the perfect place to BE.

To be or not to be depends. It mainly depends on where you are, who you’re with, and what’s on the agenda. Arriving in that sweet BEING (and knowing) spot is precious but impossible to inhabit all the time. Life happens, and we’re human, and if we don’t DO, we likely don’t eat.

As with most things, practice, pay attention, and balance #1, #2, and #3. We are complex, and balance is the goal, plus the magic key.

Until the next time: Live while you live.

Jennifer Goble, Ph.D., LPC, is the author of “My Clients…My Teachers,” and the blogger and writer of Rural Women Stories: www.ruralwomenstories.com.