Learn to make wise decisions
Being the forth child born in my family, I didn’t have to make many decisions. I was happy letting my sisters tell me what to do as long as I could tag along and enjoy myself.
As an adult, life does not allow that luxury. Everyday we are expected and required to make decisions: When do I get up? What do I wear? What do I eat? How long can I read the paper? In life we have major decisions: What career do I want? Do I want to live alone or with someone? Where do I want to live? Do I want kids?
We can be mentally healthier if we are involved in our own decisions. How sad if others are telling us what to do, how to do it, when to do it, why we should be doing it, and who we should be doing it with.
As in politics or business, it is not healthy for others to make all our decisions; nor is it healthy to make all decisions on our own without input from or consideration of others.
Many people have trouble making decisions. They would rather have someone else responsible if things go awry. They don’t want to be wrong, feel regret, or be criticized.
Making decisions takes practice. Parents let your children make decisions based on options you choose: “Do you want to wear the blue or red shirt?” “Do you want orange or apple juice?” Adjust the options as they get older. You need to help them learn how to make good choices. If not, they could have difficulty after leaving home when they no longer have your guidance.
A good practice exercise involves closing your eyes and imagining each choice. Describe each in detail, and choose the one that feels right. If they both feel the same, then both are likely good options. You can help kids with this exercise. Help them choose what is good for them. Teach them skills.
Being able to choose is an honor and privilege. Decision making skills can be learned, practiced, and mastered. Making wise decisions and taking responsibility for our own behavior contributes to good mental health far more then being someone’s puppet.
Until the next time: Live while you live