Invite new experiences

Before the first bridge hand is dealt, I always look across the table, into the eyes of my partner, and say with all sincerity, “Please forgive me in advance for all the mistakes I am about to make.” We laugh and begin the play of the cards.

Humility is good for our mental health because it balances inflated egos. Therefore I keep walking into the Duplicate Bridge room with optimism and pseudo confidence. After twenty-eight games, I leave with an overdose of humility.

I want to say to my partner, “If you don’t want to play with me again, that’s okay. I won’t be offended.” But, since I choose kind people to play with, I know in advance that they will say something encouraging, so we leave with the hopefulness of farmers, saying “Next week will be better!”

I do not believe apologizing in advance helped. In fact, I think forgiveness isn’t necessary if one does the best s/he can with the skills they have. Bridge, as in many things in life, depends on the competition. Sometimes, other people are just better; better at memorizing, analyzing, agility, strength, experience, commitment, or ability. We cannot ALL be good at EVERYTHING. Right?

My message today is about three things: 1) Perfect isn’t possible. 2) Forgiveness of self is more important than that of another person. 3) Life brings us our lessons, and that grows humility and wisdom.

If we only did what we excelled in, we would be bored and boring. What I gain from continually placing myself in a situation (Duplicate Bridge) where I am reminded of my deficiencies more than rewarded for my intelligence, is balance and perspective. It takes me out of my comfort zone and causes conflicting feelings; nervous and inadequate along with accomplished and skilled. The challenge stretches my emotions and broadens my empathy. It helps me relate to the kid who steps up to the plate and tries his/her best, but does not connect the ball with the bat.

Monday, I will go back to accept punishment or to gloat in glory; depending on cards and our ability to communicate clearly in bridge convention jargon.

Invite experiences that keep you humble, teach lessons, and feed hopefulness. They make you wiser.

Until the next time: Live while you live