It’s been an interesting week with conversations about Judaism, antisemitism, and Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), plus an uplifting lecture on how to write orchestra music from nature. Thank goodness I walked off the progression of taxing my mental and emotional capabilities in the rainy 10K Bolder Boulder on Memorial Day.

While wondering why I set an alarm and turned my legs into rubber on the 6.3-mile route, I hoped the men and women who died protecting us would be proud of their sacrifice. Would they approve of the negativity and dissension that is flowing through America? They might wonder why we are not wiser, more satisfied, and grateful.

I wonder that myself.

Today, some of us seem to be spending too much time stressing over, thinking about, criticizing, and pushing our point of view onto others. We have lost our balance, and I will tell you any day of the week that balance is the secret to mental health.

How do we ratchet down our fear, frustration, hurt, and unfairness?

Try this: Draw a line across the middle of a sheet of paper. Put a dot in the center of the line. On one end of the line, write “Disturbing,” and on the other end, write “Peaceful.”

Between the dot and “Peaceful,” write words and names that make you smile, bring you joy, help you like yourself, and, yes, bring you peace.

Between the dot and “Disturbing,” write who and what triggers angst, fire in your belly, stress in your arms, and a feeling of despair—disturbing things.

Our attainable goal is to keep our thoughts, words, and actions between the dot and “Peaceful.”

The presentation from the composer of the music helped me feel the difference. When he wrote about the mountains, his notes were high, low, harsh, and heavy. He would then slide into the trills of birds and the sounds of wildlife, flowers, and water—the sounds became soft, slow, and rhythmic. I closed my eyes, and the music eased the tension in my body—the sounds were soothing, and I felt a sense of calm.

I’m not suggesting we lose our voice, stay uninformed, or do nothing, but I want you to know you have power over yourself, so don’t wear the victim or the expert hat. Surround yourself with joyful music, people who make you smile, and activities that are free from negativity. Joy keeps us closer to our goal of peace and purpose. It also helps us distinguish between good and problematic.

For reinforcement, cut the paper in half at the dot. Wad up and throw away the half that leads to “Disturbing.” Put the other half on your refrigerator. Focus and act on what best provides a sense of peace.

Until the next time: Live while you live.

Jennifer Goble, Ph.D., LPC, is the author of “My Clients…My Teachers,” and the blogger and writer of Rural Women Stories: www.ruralwomenstories.com.

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