Knowing WHY you want to change your behavior is crucial if you desire success. For example, I used to love smoking. I would still be enjoying the feeling of sitting down, putting my feet up, and relaxing with the sweet intake of menthol, (Ahhh) if I didn’t know it would affect my breathing and likely cause an early, painful death.
I threw my Salem’s in the trash many times. My WHY for quitting was because it took too much time, it was stinky in my house, and research said it could cause lung cancer. Those were great reasons, but not strong enough to stop my addition.
Finally, I spent days identifying WHY I sincerely, from the bottom of my core, wanted to quit the nasty habit. The WHY holding the most power was, “I want to be healthy.” Every time I needed my fix, I would repeatedly say those five words until the urge deflated. My WHY helped me gain control of my false friend, cigarettes.
That was Jan. 12, 1979.
If you want to lose weight, get fit, disengage from a harmful relationship, stop compulsive buying, or release whatever demon you have, dig deep and figure out your WHY. Don’t believe something surface like, “I want to lose weight,” or “I need to get fit,” or “I hate him/her.” Your magic WHY is unique, authentic, and personal.
I went through the same process this week. I have been enjoying too much abundance and want to lose a few unwelcome pounds. I needed to find my WHY because I knew if I didn’t, day two would revert to my usual indulgences. I tried what worked for smoking, and it didn’t fit. What seems to be my authentic WHY for wanting moderation and loose fitting jeans is, “I want to like myself.”
Wish me luck.
If you want a change, search until you identify your most influential WHY. It doesn’t remove your responsibility, but it takes the edge off and brings you back to your initial goal. It helps you stay on the wagon.
Remember, your WHY is original to you and to the targeted addiction or behavior you want to change. Give it a try if you are struggling with having control over something. In the process, enjoy learning more about your core values.
What’s your WHY?
Until the next time: Live while you live.
Jennifer Goble, Ph.D., LPC, is the author of “My Clients…My Teachers,” and the blogger and writer of Rural Women Stories: www.ruralwomenstories.com.
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